meeting girls at a cocktail party

At cocktail parties, some guys just seem to attract women naturally, well, just not you! But why? What can you do to improve your charm? It’s not just looks that count, although good looks help. But for nerds like you, there are things you can do to improve you chances. In this issue, we talk about conversation techniques.

The number one fear people face when entering a cocktail party is about starting a conversation. You stand at the entrance like an idiot while everyone already has someone to talk to. You feel awkward and pretend to head for the food/drinks and put one sweating hand inside your pocket. NO, this is not the way! You can do better than this.

You gotta start a conversation ASAP. If you keep standing alone, you’ll just look like a loser. Here’s how. Observe the people who are already engaged in a conversation. By the looks on people’s faces you can tell if you’re welcome to join in the conversation. If you lack such sensitivity, just don’t try to break into a conversation where both parties seem to be emerged in their own worlds. You’ll be rudely interrupting. You might try to join in a conversation that seemed to be a little dry. Perhaps you are the person to light up the dried conversation. Sometimes it’s rude to interrupt, but you can tell by the body and facial cues that some people don’t mind you joining in. Join in the conversation soon to establish your “base” in the cocktail party. Learn people’s names and what they do by heart because this will come handy later on.

More later…how to control the pace and dictate a conversation.