I have seen lots of miserable moves from guys in Disco/Club (or bar with dance floor, whatever you want to call that). Now let us share some secrets on how to pick up ladies on the dance floor or club.

Remember, to be able to pick up ladies on dance floor or clubs, you need to understand what works and what doesn’t in that atmosphere, as well as pick the right atmosphere. Are you ready? Let’s start from the venue and music choice, shall we?

Music - First thing first, just focus on Hip Hop club, forget about all other trance, techno, house clubs, period. You only need to be good at hip hop dance to pick up ladies on the dance floor, forget about dancing trance, techno, etc. Why? Because you can really dance with a girl together in Hip Hop, not trance or techno. If you want to do Salsa, that’s fine too. The key is to go to a club that plays music that you can actually dance with girls; not dance alone.

Venue - Pick a medium size venue. If the venue is too small or too big (with few people), all your pick up moves from one corner will be spotted by everyone from the other corner, which drastically decreases you chance if you fail. Remember, this is a trial and error game, so there are success and failure, if you fail on one , move on to the others. So you better not be spotted on failure by all the people in the club

Dress - I have seen lots of guys dressing sloppy in the clubs. Come on guys, you are meeting girls, so please dress smart and sexy. No shorts and nerdy clothes please. Here are my tips, dress shirt and jeans, and dress shoes always work. Most of the girls like it, neat and sexy. Do NOT tuck-in your shirts. Make sure you wear some good cologne because girls are very sensitive to good cologne; they would even come up and praise your cologne and sniff on your neck if your smell impresses them! Wearing cap or hat is not a bad idea if you want to act cool. But remember, you have to look cool, not dumb.

This is it for Part I. Hope it is useful. More parts coming.

Now forget about verbal communication

A confident person does not necessary have good communication skills. These people are described as being cocky. Meanwhile, some people are very confident, firm, and sometimes quite intimidating but not necessary cocky. What’s the difference?

Confident people who: lack communication skills, cannot empathize with other people, refuse to acknowledge that people could have different views to be respected, are frequently judged as “cocky”.

Confident people who: listen to others, acknowledge that other people are entitled to their views while standing firm on his/her own values, are charming.

So how do you improve your communications skills and build your charm? First of all, shut your mouth. Listen, instead. If you’re talking all the time, people will think you’re in love with yourself. The world doesn’t revolve around you? And after a while, they’ll get tired of listening to your stories. People will be interested in your stories only if you listen to theirs, and try to find something to connect with. So, remember this is rule number ONE.

Two, try to read their mind. You gotta be sensitive. You should read beyond one’s words. For everything a girl tells you, there is another side of the story that she didn’t tell. For example, if a girl talks about a previous break-up, or mentions an ex-boyfriend more than once. She is definitely a little bitter about it. She may say she is not, but in your mind you should have made a mental note. In short, look for signs, try to read into people’s minds even though they don’t tell you things. Then you will be able to form a mental picture of that person you’re talking to.

Three, respect others. This is by no means the least of the rules. You should respect other people’s views. Don’t be a total jerk. Believe in what you believe, but you don’t have to trash other people, ok. Learn that, and don’t use words to hurt or insult others. You will gain respect and charm.

Attitude is the key of getting girls. You do not need to have a perfectly handsome look of Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt to be able to score hot girls; you just need to have a charismatic attitude. A large part of being smooth lies on showing your unique attitude. It’s the attitude that triggers seduction and emotional wants from the opposite sex.

What’s ‘charismatic’ means in girls mind? Should you be a super nice guy? NO. Be the opposite of it. This is the only important thing to remember if you forget everything from this post. Why being a super nice guy won’t get your any girls? Because there are all other men out there are the nice guys! You do not stand out in front of girls by being another ‘ nice guy. Period.

Attractive girls always have a crush (or fall in love) with bad guys, like rockstar, motorcycle rebels, cowboys, etc. Why? Because they are rebels, unique in a male seductive ways, and female likes it. Humans are mammals, which are no different from animals; female is attracted to male’s dominant genres, power, and conquering attitude.

Don’t get us wrong, you do not really need to play guitar, ride motorcycle to get girls (of course that would help though), you just need to have the same ‘bad guy’ attitude. This attitude can be learnt. We will discuss about this in the later posts. To start with, just remember not to do what a normal nice guy would do, and they you are already half way through success.

Nerds never get any girls because they lack the confidence. As I explained in earlier articles, a major part of confidence comes from knowing yourself and feeling comfortable to express it.

You need to know where your bottom line is. Don’t let the girl intimidate you, even though she is a drop-dead gorgeous super-model. Dinner-whores, as they were popularly called on blogs and online forums, are notorious for using their looks to intimidate guys into paying for all kinds of perks. Surely, they dump you in the end and never put out. Nerds are especially vulnerable. This is why you need to build up your confidence. You can be firm and clear when you know your bottom line. Don’t be a “yes-man”. Being a “yes-man” will never get you girls.

Be firm. If she wants to eat Thai food but you’re wildly allergic to Thai food. Just say NO. There are guys who would go with it. If she’s asking for something outrageous on your first date and you don’t feel comfortable, complain, by all means. If she wants to see a movie that is totally uninteresting to you, decline! The point of going to the movies together is to watch a movie that you BOTH enjoy. If she doesn’t have the right attitude, she’s not worth your effort. Sometimes, you have to be a jerk.

A confident man attracts females

So being a nerd, condemned forever to be unable to get laid, how do you turn things around, build your confidence and attract women?

Do something, be someone. First you gotta stop being a bum. I’ve seen many cases of guys that are total losers who bum around doing nothing. You’ll never get women like that. You must be good at something. If you’re good at something useful, work on it, develop your talent. Men with no talent are a total turnoff for women. If you have nothing to show and nothing to talk about, how un-interesting are you? Nobody wants to talk to a person like that.

If you think your talent is weird and out-of-the-line, okay, but do something about it. Having achieved something is better than nothing. If you talent is removing belly-button lint without using hands, fine. Perform at a club, start a weirdo’s freak-show or something. At least your local paper will cover your event (assuming you didn’t already end up on the police log). Having achieved something proves that you have the drive to succeed in life. Women will respect that.

All the nerds are thinking, to be able to score girls, you need to be super nice guy, like calling the girls all the time, treating them for dinners, walking them home, in order to show your interest, right? WRONG! Wake up guys, be Cool. Let me tell you all, to be able to score girls, you need to be the exact opposite! How?

Be different - Be opposite to a nice guy! Never explicitly praise a girl, never buy girls dinner, never ‘walk’ the girl home, never call the girls, never buy girls gift in any non-special occasion. Yes you hear us right! Do the opposite things to what all the nice guys do. Good news for you: Being a cool guys is pretty easy, do not do anything, keep the girls guessing. Now this is different!

Seductive Attitude - Then all of you are going to ask: Okay I could not do all the above, then what can I do? Be more ‘Proud’ about yourself in front of girls, and show in actions that the girls (even the drop-dead gorgeous ones that you are dying to get) are not that important to you. We are not asking you to praise yourself all the time, but we are asking you to act like a jerk in front of girls to seduce them. You need to have the attitude that you are giving the girls a chance to meet you, rather than you give them a chance. Stop making her think that she’s the center of attention. YOU are the center of attention. The strategy is to be in front of the girls, but treat them as normal people (less important than you). Show the girls that they are just normal people. Do not panic because you like that girl

Seductive Tease - This is a further step to get girls once you master the chill and jerk attitude. Instead of praising the girls all the time (which 1000 other normal guys do), tease the girls. Yes you heard me right! Tease them. How? Try this: Instead of saying ‘Wow your hair is beautiful’, playfully tease the girls and say ‘Haha you hair looks like a wig!’ and touch on their hair at the same time. Instead of saying ‘your dress looks pretty’, say ‘Your dress makes you look like a Christmas tree, Ha!’ Say it with a sense of humor or laugh, and briefly touch their hair or dress; or even ask them to turn around and see if they get fat. Girls will not be angry at these, instead they will feel more comfortable with you.

Look! Now you are different from the other guys!

Confidence

Looks isn’t all that counts. Have you noticed that it’s not necessarily good looks that make a guy popular? Ever wondered why that bald pig, as you call him, is with a young hot lady. Most guys arrive at the conclusion: she’s after his money, he’s just a rich bastard; yea yea yea, that’s just the sour grapes! But if you’re serious about improving your chances with the ladies, you should ask questions in more depth. Learn from others’ strengths and mistakes.

It’s really the success, power and confidence of men that attracts women. If a man is successful, there is something charming about him that women find sexy. Men in powerful positions have an ability to influence and motivate others. This kind of emotional power over others can capture women’s hearts easily. Similarly, men with confidence are more attractive to women.

So, what does it mean for you nerds? You gotta have Confidence! Stop acting like a nerd. Build your self-esteem. How to have confidence? Well, I’m not your mom. But I’ll share a little bit. I think the major factors are (1) do something, be someone, (2) asserting yourself, and (3) communication skills.

A lot of nerds will do/think this way: Wow I really like/admire this girl, let me call her all the time and see if she would go out with me. Big mistake!

DO NOT call the girls at all! I repeat DO NOT call the girls at all. Even if you do, keep it shortly, keep the phone conversation under 2 minute, period. Girls are sensible animals, if they sense ‘Oh my god! This guys is calling me all the time, and he’s not cute’, you will be immediately flagged ‘Loser’ on your face. You will never be able to score that girl.

Let me ask all of your: Have you tried being ditched by a girl at the last minute with some lame reason? ‘Oh my cousin is in town!’, ‘Oh I did not feel well!’, ‘Oh I have to stop by my friends’ birthday!’ These are all lame reasons. They ditch you because you are Not Important to her. Period. Do not give yourself excuse. You are probably calling her too many times and freaking her out. She is probably not interested in you. You Losers!

Here is what you should do. To keep in touch with girls, do not call them all the time. Talking on the phone does not help scoring her. Meeting her in person is the key. So you got what I mean, everything single time you pick up the phone and call the girl, there is one and only one purpose: to ask her out, nothing else. To avoid awkward situation, I suggest sending the girls SMS (Text message) rather than calling her.

When asking the girls out via SMS, there are 2 rules.

Rule number 1: Never send a close question like ‘Do you want to go out on Sat night?’ In this case she will feel weird and just say ‘No’ and make up some lame excuse to ditch you. Instead, you should ask an open-ended question, like ‘Hey what are you doing Saturday?’ This way, you give her a chance to invite you to ask her out :. If the girl is a little playful or interested I you, she will usually say ‘Oh nothing much, Why?’ What she really means is ‘Oh do you want to ask me out, stud?’ You are half-way towards success.

Rule number 2: Do not make the girl feels that she’s important. Let’s say the girl says ‘Oh nothing much, why?’, then you should say this ‘Oh I and couple friends are going to this bar tonight, do you want to join us?’ See this is very natural and usually the girl will say ‘yes’. Why? Because it seems like you are cool, and what’s more important, you do not seem like a freak or stocker. If she says ‘no’, no big deal, you can be cool and say ‘oh next time then’ and ask her out next time. Again, the key is not to make the girl feel she’s important, so do NOT twist around the date/time/event as if she’s the princess. You have to have a standpoint and that’s what the girls like.

When you go out with her, you can simply bring some friends out and let the girl join (make sure you do not bring another nerd/loser!) or you can just make up some excuse like ‘Oh my friends could not make it’

Good luck on asking her out!